A Bold New Campaign For Bocas del Toro

Nature. Who needs it April Fools 2024

Bocas del Toro has been quietly rolling out its new unofficial slogan with a refreshing approach to a modern day promotional launch strategy: no press releases, no influencers, no giveaways, no galas, no jingles. Just the song of chainsaws and a four word catch phrase that encapsulates the zeitgeist of the Bocas del Toro of 2024: Nature. Who Needs It?

Our first pitch was “F*ck Nature!” However, that one was already taken by a city called Lahore in Pakistan,” remembers Cindy Perlau, an urban branding strategist representing the Once-ler Consulting Group.

The campaign has been met with skepticism, since Bocas del Toro in recent years has catered to a burgeoning surf tourism and eco-tourism industry, however all stakeholders are being assured this is a plan that will equate to more tourism.

“If you compare Bocas del Toro to major successful cities like New York, for example, there are many, many paved roads. Bocas is in a good position to have a proportionate amount of asphalt to NYC, by the year 2033,” Hector Pineda stated, civil engineering content creator on TikTok. “We already have a Central Park in Bocas, so that should satiate most peoples’ appetite for nature, no?”

Proponents of the campaign cite opportunities for new industry and innovation. Afterall, it was just one year ago from today on April 1, 2023, when Henry Gerzinski from the engineering division of Once-ler Corporation unveiled his vision for concrete and titled structures with the aesthetic and function of all local flora in one. He calls his invention: The Tarbol.

The tarbol

“Trees are kind of annoying and dangerous if you really think about it. And they don’t create many jobs. And what’s more is that with this new invention, we may have the potential to share the fruits of modern man’s luxury with monkeys, sloths and other rainforest critter friends. We can’t assume they prefer to live in trees, if they’ve never experienced the comfort of a Tarbol.”

Gerzinski went on to explain that since Tarboles have 12 times the strength and durability of traditional trees, they will be instrumental in connecting wildlife canopy bridges on the island, which based on the current advancement in widening the roads, will have to be installed sooner than later.

The Tarbol

No one quite understands the April 1, 2023 presentation by Mr. Gerzinski, but it was well-received nonetheless

Recurring visitors are weighing in via social media, watching the campaign unfold in real time through lenses of the many Bocas del Toro-based accounts they watch from home as they plan their next island escape. “When I first visited, Panama’s national slogan was Panama For Nature. I liked that, but I also like Costa Rica and Indonesia too…” explained yogi, wanderlusterer and aspiring travel influencer @tiffany.totally.travels, 31 year-old Tiffany Albott, of Rochester, New York, USA.

“If you don’t like it, leave!” was another slogan considered, but in the end, it just didn’t hit as hard as Nature. Who Needs It? according to the urban branding specialist, Perlau.

We sat down with one last expert, renowned sociologist, Roberto Ortiz. His professional perspective on the matter was illuminating:

“Did anyone ever once ask the Bocatoreños if they wanted their home to become some “eco-tourism destination”? That’s a real question. And I’ll add that one societal benefit of the new roads is that it will give families the opportunity to access beautiful areas of their home island they could not easily access before, and with that brings economic opportunities.”

This campaign is a hot topic for conversation and The Breeze is receiving a lot of comments from the community, but what stands out is the daily message from an anonymous social media account: “A tree falls the way it leans. Be careful which way you lean.”

Article by Richard Mentira

Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, or actual events is purely coincidental. Not sure who needs to hear this at this point, but…APRIL FOOLS!!!

(1 de abril es el Día de los Inocentes en muchas culturas alrededor del mundo.)

This April Fool’s Day joke article, along with any and all entertainment our small but mighty team can muster, is made possible only by our Breeze Card members.