Culture

Bocas del Toro Province To Be Renamed

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Bocas del Toro Province To Be Renamed

During November’s emergency road repair, there was a discovery of an ancient cave of hidden gold; massive amounts that were kept secret for obvious security reasons. The cave, uncovered by a landslide, contained gold hidden from Christopher Columbus’ expedition after it was discovered his ships were aggressively taking local gold to bring to Spain. Columbus failed to discover what Mother Nature uncovered. Military forces removed the gold over 2 weeks to protect the discovery. No publicity was allowed.

Christopher Columbus looking like a smirk and savage bastard before he made it weird for everyone.
Cristobal Colón not feeling so fun about the gold he left behind in his 4th voyage.

 

The whereabouts of the natural vault was kept secret, but contained so much gold that Columbus brought 4 ships in 1502 to extract it- if found. Any minerals found in road project must be incorporated in the road (the Treaty of El Camino Incorporal), hereby tons of gold must, by law, be put into the asphalt.

The Bocas del Toro region will literally have roads paved with gold. The gold will cause a sparkling effect on our roads and the hope is the tourism attraction will be more valuable than the actual gold itself. President Laurentino Cortizo was so impressed with the idea, in an effort to attract tourism, he has signed a law so the province name will be changed to Bocas del Oro – “Mouths of Gold.”  The law will be known as “Oro de Tontos” and is effective April 1st.

 

Follow the yellow brick road a magical graphic from Wizard of Oz with the city of oz in the background, leavin the forest and following the famous yellow brick road to Oz

April Fools day being circled on a calendar with a highlighter- April 1st

A special thanks to Ted Hannig for his slippery sense of humor, and never wavering support of the community.

April Fools Day brought to you by Ted Hannig and The Banana Peel and the Bocas Breeze, a banana with a goatee and everyone is laughing

 

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2 Responses

  1. Remarkably news regarding gold found and the renaming of Bocas. As a Jamaican sister I am happy Columbus was denied. Looking forward to visit soon

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